Slow Woman Running

Intro:

I've known Slow Woman Running for a few years.  I knew she wanted to get into running but I don't think she ever committed to it.....till now.  I finally convinced her to contribute to the blog.  I asked her why do you run.  Below is her explanation. (Slow man running)

Heh, I've tried this before...

Blogging..

Only, this time it means something more.....

So my dear friend Slow Man (my motivation) has asked me... Why am I running?

I did my first run of the year tonight after work.. I didn't even give myself time to talk myself out of it.. I just came home.. pulled my old New Balance shoes out of the closet.. covered in cat hair.. unworn for years.. and cleaned them off.. and it felt good.. like an accomplishment of it's own.. so I stretched.. and off I went!

Now, I wasn't trying to be a hero.... it was 1.87 km.. flat terrain, suburbs...... I ran for 1 minute and walked for 2 minutes.. This was my goal for today.... Not that I really had a say in the matter.. My lungs were pumping.. and my heart was racing and pounding so hard I could feel it in my ears!.. so the walking was definitely necessary :)…. and this is why I know I need to keep pushing..

I used to play on a Female Rep Lacrosse Team.. I used to play and referee minor soccer.. and run!!.. oh boy did I run!!

I need that part of me back.. I need to be able to feel that if I want to, I can just get up and go..!

I need to do something for me.. every day.. I need to set aside that 30 minutes a day to just think.. and watch.. and listen.. to the world.. and to myself.. and I want to be able to run fast enough that negative thoughts fall behind.. and self affirmation pulls me forward..

I'm running for my health.. physically.. and mentally.. and most definitely emotionally!!

I've started on a new path.. in hopes of finding a route back to the person I have lost over the years.... sounds cliché.. I know!

But, the tale of a girl working to live.. pay the rent.. the car.. and keep the creditors at bay.. scraping through the 'daily grind', losing interest in all of those things she used to love.. like playing the saxophone.. or lacrosse.. or soccer.. or painting..... the girl finding excuses, and curling up in a blanket on the couch in attempts to shelter herself from the cold of the solitary feeling she's created within herself.. is real!... it's where I have been for over 4 years now.... and 30lbs later..

It doesn't make it any easier to know your family has a history of depression, and anxiety disorders.. it just means it's not surprising that I often feel low.. or unmotivated.. it's so much easier to hide.. and pretend that it's more comfortable to live in an overweight, out of shape, and tired body.. than it is to get out and challenge yourself on a daily basis... and push to achieve what you REALLY want, when you look into the mirror everyday and say... ew.

There are so many easy temptations.. do I come home and relax on the couch with a cold, frosty beer.. or do I walk in the door and put my runners on and go out.. for a walk.. or a jog.. or both.. and skip the brew..

Do I sleep for 15 more minutes.. or do I get up and throw on some jogging pants and a sweater and run the stairs for 10 minutes?

Well, I'm choosing to get my runners on.. I'm choosing to get up earlier starting today.

So Why am I running?

I need to run.. I want to run.. For so many reasons.. which I am sure I will get into along the way.. but most of all.... I need ME back!

I hope you will follow me, as I discover how far I can go.. I would like to eventually run a half marathon and look back at this day as the day that I decided to change.. The day I took control of my life, and my happiness!